Why Digital Age Conversations?

So let me start off by completely putting myself out there…. I LOVE and am intrigued by most developments in technology, my favourite being the positive impact and effect of communications advances. Having been born in a time and era where the internet and most modern technology were deemed inaccessible and alien I learnt to find my way around these things with much awe and extreme fascination. I am a self taught user of most platforms and devices due my curiosity and incessant desire to learn new things. I also love shiny things that can keep me entertained for as long as I need it. I mean, in today’s stressful, busy world which one of us doesn’t enjoy some time out with a nice toy that is filled with news, music, literature, information, communication, games, whatever takes your fancy?

We clamor for equitable and affordable access to the internet as well as the latest mobile device and unquestionably embrace the new technologies. However, there is little or no real understanding of the legal, social and corporate implications of using these new technologies. Of note, data protection and privacy in Africa is still a serious cause for concern especially when it comes to vulnerable members of society like children.

And herein lies my very deep concern.

One time when my daughter was nine she asked me a rather uncomfortable question. She wanted to know what sexual intercourse was. After the initial shock, confusion and sheer trauma of her totally unexpected question (because I believe that she will always be an innocent baby) my next instinct was to ask her why she was asking me that question. Of course the response started off with, “…my friends said….” It was at that moment that I was reminded that children are curious and information is always readily available to them from different sources and in different forms…. whether we like it or not. It also pushed me to do something that I had been putting off for a very long time… having THE life conversation with my daughter whom, if I could, I would keep all cuddled up and safe in my warm, loving arms far away from the big, bad world, forever.

Our conversation was not as scary nor as awkward as I feared and afterwards my little angel said that she was very relieved to have a mum who was open with her and I thanked her for trusting me and not being afraid to ask me about anything that she was curious about. I inwardly I prayed that she would always be so open with me.

We then moved on to another conversation which is often overlooked or ignored by most parents and guardians but one which is becoming increasingly critical in our modern society…. the parent and child Digital Age Conversation.

We are living in a new era, totally different from the one most of us grew up in. Our lives are now highly influenced, even centered on the internet and all things digital. We spend a lot more time using electronic mobile gadgets and exposure to these devices has extended to children from the moment that they leave the womb (and in some cases before). Whether our children are exposed to new technologies and the internet at the “right” age is a whole other conversation. Like sexual intercourse as parents we have a responsibility to speak to our children about the dangers, challenges and duties that go with access to the internet. We need to have more conversations with our children on issues such as digital reputation, online privacy and the permanent status of data on the internet.

It is not enough to have parental controls or passwords on devices, neither is it sufficient to snoop into your children’s devices for clues on what your child is up to. The process to helping your child explore and use the internet and telecommunications gadgets successfully is to trust them and more importantly to have them trust you.  To develop a positive appreciation and understanding of the safe and responsible use of technology it is vital that we talk to our children as well as to listen to their views with a receptive and open mind.

Eric Schmidt and Jared Cohen aptly state in the paperback edition of The New Digital Age (2013), that “Data performance is a hallmark of the digital era, and there’s nothing we can do about the fact that what we do today is recorded and stored with no expiration date and no “erase” button.” This is one of the reasons why parents have an urgent responsibility to have these critical conversations with their children. Children need to be guided on what they post online. They need to be taught to participate actively, responsibly and safely in the digital space. They should be advised that posts on personal, religious, ethnic, political issues could mark them for life, even way after their views have shifted or evolved.

The first lesson for this series which applies not just to children and young people, but to adults as well is that…. before you post please THINK!

T – is it true?

H – is it hurtful?

I – is it illegal?

N – is it necessary?

K – is it kind?

The truth is that as parents, guardians, communities we have to be proactive instead of reactive to these inevitable digital age threats to our children and young people. These issues have to be dealt with swiftly and collectively for the sake pf our precious children who are tomorrow's future.

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Edith M. Utete is the Founder of “Digital Age Conversations”, a platform to discuss concerns, share practical advice and find productive solutions for the issues that arise as a result of our growing exposure and access to the internet within a Christian and African context.

#digitalcitizenship #onlinesafety